Dear Troll

This post is to the troll that left the emo comment on Valentines Day.

Aren't you a fiesty one, claiming you looked up the nice lady's name and discovered all sorts of birth and death records (even though Kristel herself denies having any when confronted.) Didn't you know LA seals the actual death records for 50 years?  You couldn't "see a death certificate online" if you wanted too.  They do, however, have a master birth and death index and Kristel's fake babies are nowhere on it!

No Grace Marie Breaux was born or died in the United States in 2010.

No baby by the name of "Landen Breaux" was born or died in 2014 in the United States (and according to Kristel he "fought for his life" in the NICU for 21 days, so he most definetely would have had both a birth and death certificate!  (An old man by the name of Lionel Breaux died, however.)  LOL

There is no Blaine Breaux, Claire Breaux, Callie Breaux or Charlotte Breaux.

Sorry. 

Thank you and come again.

Kristel Harasses Facebook

It's always fun to watch Kristel go on a verbal tirade against innocent bystanders.  Even complete strangers realize she has issues!

Here are a few good ones!  Enjoy!

The Phenomenon that is "Grace Marie."

Once upon a time Kristel's husband got fired and Kristel was pissed.

She devoted many hours to facebooking how she was going to get even.

She went to the library.  She researched attorneys.  She promised she would make these people sorry!

(Of course she did nothing but threaten and complain.)

Months went by and Kristel went about her business of cooking gumbo and harassing people online who didn't agree with her 100% on whatever she was ranting about that day.

Then one day in August Kristel was bored and needed attention so she decided to make up a story.

And, boy did she make up one whopper of a story!

She decided to tell the world she had a dead baby on May 1, 2010.

Keep in mind Kristel was never pregnant.

And also, keep in mind Kristel forgot to go back and delete her facebook updates from the first part of May.

Instead, she just, out of the blue, made up this outlandish story about a dead baby resulting from a  pregnancy she forgot to mention.

You see, Kristel is obsessed with facebook.

She takes selfies, "checks in" and posts every minute detail of her life - so how could she go from not pregnant to having a baby die in her arms at 27 weeks, or was it 24 weeks?

Kristel can't remember.

She also can't remember if she gave birth to this wonder child in a hospital or at home.  (The world may never know.)

But, we were all flabbergasted to start getting updates of a backyard burial, a body being exhumed and a home birth with no death certificate being issued.

The first we heard of this infamous Grace Marie is when Kristel posted a hill of gravel with a strange flower growing out of the top that was suppossedly the burial spot for this poor child:

 

She also posted a picture of the shoebox coffin Grace was buried in, although when questioned, Kristel quickly backtracked and made up some bullshit about the shoebox actually fitting inside an a real coffin that was then buried in the gravel pit.

MMhhmmmm SHURE!

When people started to question how an infant can be allowed to be buried in a gravel pile out back Kristel decided she better come up with a better story... and quick!

So, she bought a garden stone from Fingerhut.com and had it personalized (it comes free with purchase!)

She then snuck over to Esther cemetery and dumped it off on the side of a real grave, decorated it with butterflies from Dollar General that look like the plastic from a 6 pack of Natty Light that she probably drank on the way over and cussed anyone out that dared to question her.

(I always thought tombstones had to be flush with the ground, not propped up!)

Sometimes Kristel would forget all about poor fake Grace Marie.

 

Sometimes Grace Marie was born at 27 weeks and took her last breaths in her mothers arms at the hospital while the mean ole doctors refused treatment.

Other times poor Grace Marie was born "a few days shy of 24 weeks" at home and no authorities were notified.

Sometimes Kristel sends message pretending to be Jonathan and swears Grace Marie was born at home:

The cemetery has no record of and Grace Marie being "buried" there.  Maybe because the "grave" is just a garden stone Kristel dumped out there for attention and it' sole purpose is to take pictures for "proof"?

But, whether you believe the grave has a body under it or not, you damn sure better not question Kristel, because, even if she is only 4 weeks postpartum from giving birth to fake baby Landon, she will hunt you down and kill you while you sleep (AFTER she has you arrested for stalking, of course!)

And the plot thickens..... (and by plot I mean the FAKE plot at Esther's cemetery.)  LOL

Stay tuned for more of Kristel's shennanigans.  

Next up...Kristel threatens to sue/arrest/fight half of facebook!




Kristel Prudhomme, Kristel Prudhomme Breaux, Grace Marie Breaux, Kristel Breaux stillborn, Landon Breaux

The Life and Times of Kristel & Her Imaginary Babies

Once upon a time there was a crazy girl named Kristel.

Kristel loved to pretend she was pregnant even though her tubes were tied.

Kristel loved to complain about being infertile and beg for money for IVF.

She took money and baby items from anyone gullible enough to donate to her.

 

One day, after spending the past 2 months harassing her friends and family for money after a failed IVF attempt, Kristel all the sudden became magically pregnant with a 7 month fetus.

It was a true miracle!

A woman with her tubes tied, who had just started an online website for donations (and accepted money, no less) to do IVF to try to get pregnant was suddenly  pregnant!  And, in her 3rd trimester, no less!

How could this be!  It was a medical miracle!  A phenomenon almost as unbelievable as the Blessed mother and the Christ child himself!

How could a woman from Louisiana go from infertile and bumming donations online to 7 months pregnant in a weeks time?

It was the 8th wonder of the world!

Was Kristel scared?  Was she confused?  Did she wonder how this could be?  Oh no! Not Kristel!  She was too busy tweeting!

 (Kristel, honey, babies arent carried in your booty!)

Thats right!  Kristel went from infertile and trying to drum up money for infertility treatments in October to tweeting belly shots supposedly 7 months pregnant on November 8, 2013.

KRISTEL!   You are something else!  LOL

Not only did Kristel try to trick us into believing she was pregnant, she even made her silly husband pose in pictures with her!

(That's one HUMONGOUS belly for someone who's not preggo!)

It was so obnoxious, her lies.  Kristel really tried to trick her friends and neighbors into believing she was pregnant even though she has no fallopian tubes! 

Kristel accepted donations.

She accepted homemade baby gifts.

And when the clock ran out and it was time to produce a baby...

Well, Kristel stole a picture of a baby off the Huggies website and pretended it was hers!

KRISTEL!  YOU NAUGHTY GIRL!  

Didnt your mama teach you not to lie, Kristel!

But, lie she did!

She posted these pictures of herself:

We were all ASTONISHED to see that her newborn baby, Landon, was a model for Huggies and Fox News a full year before he was born!

It was like magic!

Not only did Kristel go from being not-pregnant to 7 months pregnant in a few weeks time, she was also pregnant with a baby that had done a modeling shoot the year before!  WOW!

We were all so excited to meet this magic baby!  We couldn't wait to get his autograph (considering he had already modeled for HUGGIES and Fox News!

Would he continue modeling?  Would he go on to do motion pictures?

The world was baby Landon's oyster!

His future was so bright!

A magic baby... that was an in demand MODEL!

As the weeks ticked on we waited and waited and asked questions about this wonder child - only to be shot down and cussed out by Kristel!

It seems this medical phenomenon, this miracle baby, had suddenly died, conveniently just as people were starting to get suspicious as to why Kristel could never show him off.

How tragic... but expected.

You see, Kristel gets pregnant all the time.  Pretty much every other month, in fact.  

But, strangely enough, none of her babies ever live.  

They always conveniently die when Kristel can no longer make excuses for why there is no baby at the end of 9 months (or 2 months, considering Kristel never has time for the first 2 trimesters.)  

In case you didn't know, when Kristel gets pregnant she conceives at 7 months!  

Sometimes she just has stillborns without even being pregnant!  (Like the phenomenon of Grace Marie - the stillborn that appeared out of thin air... or did she live a few hours?  Kristel can never remember!)

Sometimes Kristel has twins.  Sometimes they die without anyone ever knowing she was pregnant.

 

Sometimes she miscarries twins and then goes dancing at the club!

Pregnancy - AIN'T NOBODY GOT TIME FOR DAT!

And, don't you dare try to ask Kristel about the specifics of these pregnancies or she will cuss you out and threaten to put you in jail.

Kristel, she's a real character!

Stay tuned for more adventures!





Kristel Prudhomme,  Kristel Prudhomme Breaux, Kristel Thomason,  Grace Marie Breaux,  Landon Breaux